We love it when staffers send us their feel-good stories and industry gripes, but there’s something to be said for the ridiculous mishaps that only people in staffing can truly appreciate. A few months ago we created a post of some examples, followed by a sequel, and then it became a trilogy. This is Part 4, and while you may not think it’s as pure as the first, at least it doesn’t have nuked fridges or Shia LaBeouf.
Enjoy more hilarious horror stories from the staffing trenches.
Connie, who’d prefer to stay anonymous
I was interviewing a mother one time, and she had brought her preschool-aged son along to the interview. During the interview he climbed onto her lap, then lifted up her shirt and started nursing. She continued on as if she didn't even notice.
Robert Crisuolo, founder and president of KO Staffing Services
I recently had advertised for a position for laborers that required 40 hour OSHA experience. I had a call from one applicant that told me, “Not only do I have 40 hour ocean experience, but I’ve been a scuba diver for years!”
Mary Warszynski, general manager of Employment Plus
We had a person who had applied for a poultry farm. The head of that department saw the candidate get out of his car, go in the building, and walk down the hall. He did not get the job because he walked too slowly. I am not kidding.
Tonya, who’d also prefer to stay anonymous
When working with the public, every day is a new adventure. After having to "furlough" several temps (not my choice of words, but the client's corporate office dictated that we not say "laid off", which everyone understands...which created more issues than not ... anyway ...), we were finally given the go-ahead to bring a few back on board. All was going well, until we came to one young man.
This "furlough" had only been a month at most, but apparently that is plenty long for unemployed folks to score some good weed and smoke out their frustrations. This guy was being upfront, for the most part, so I thought I would give him a little time to let the THC exit his system. He assured me that it wouldn't take long because he hadn't smoked much. Time passed, and it was time to test. He didn't just fail – he FAILED.
When it came time to explain how he would not be returning to work, he said "Wait! I ordered some of that synthetic urine and just got the delivery notification. Would it be okay if I go home and get it?"
Huh? My onsite supervisor and I just stared at each other in disbelief. I then had to go into a lesson of how to tell the truth, which I’ll go ahead and call The Tiger Two-Yard Drop Effect.